63-Why Do People Argue So Much?

Why Do People Argue So Much?
By Carlton Foster – October 21, 2019

Spouse FightingPeople argue because they are exercising their normal tendencies to be punitive. We are quick to inflict or punish a person that you in your mind realized or perceived that somebody did or say something wrong. You as the judge and jury need to inflict the just punishment or reprimand for the wrongs that the person had done. In your eyes, you have to set the wrongs, right.

Now the accused persons, on the other hand, feel as if they are being attacked, and naturally they put up their defense mechanism. Their reactions kicked in, and the accused persons lashed out and argued their point of views to show you that they are not wrong, that you are the one that is wrong in thinking that they were in error of saying or doing whatever you had accused them of; so the arguments started, and the deliberation of the back-and-forth justifications and condemnations, the judgments pronounced.

All these techniques of applying punishment that we have studied and practiced are being implemented during an argument. So the question is, why do we argue so much? I recently saw where a person was requesting prayer, asking God for help to stop, eliminate, or reduce the arguments between her and her husband. She is praying and asking us to intercede with God for help in that situation. We all need help in these matters; however, we are not aware that we are causing the issue; we initiate the arguments, we fuel the arguments, we contribute to the arguments and then we pray asking God to eliminate or reduce the arguments.

The answer to the prayer request starts with you! First, cease from being an arbitrator or judge on something that you perceived is wrong and is not factual. Instead of being punitive in your demeanor or with your actions or words, instead why not embraces love or do praise report. If you don’t have the facts, remove the judgments. Why not do something that the other person will appreciate, by showing how kind, good, and loving the other person is? When you perceived (and you could be wrong) that the person has done or say something wrong, the accused will lash out and argue their point. You will get what you propagate.

The Bible says that you reap what you sow! Are you reaping contentions and arguments? Then stop sowing those things.


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